SONNY & CHER COMEDY HOUR - SEASON ONE
The first six shows ran as a summer replacement in 1971 before Sonny and Cher actually got their own series that December
SHOW
1
Guest: Jimmy Durante
1.
Sonny and Cher open the show with a medley of "The Beat Goes On"
and "It Don't Come Easy", followed by a monologue featuring banter
from their nightclub act.
2. As the Bonos sing "Close
To You", security guards keep Sonny away from Cher, who is wearing
the 750-carat Star of Queensland, believed to be the world's largest
black sapphire (provided by Kazanjiian Jewels of Beverly Hills).
3. Jimmy is featured in a
production number of "Mrs. Robinson" and "Some Of These Days"
4. Sonny dresses as a penguin
to look for his National Geographic magazine.
5. Cher sings "You Made Me
Love You"
6. Sonny joins Cher on stage,
claiming to be a fantastic swordsman who can rescue any fair damsel
from the clutches of evil.
7. "The Vamps" -- Julius Caesar
(Jimmy) comes to claim the hand of Cleopatra (Cher) in marriage;
the father of Pocahontas (Jimmy) orders John Smith (Sonny) beheaded
for his involvement with the lovely Indian princess (Cher); and
Mata Hari (Cher) schemes to get the truth out of Jimmy.
8. "The Cultural Spot" --
Television commercials provide the libretto for "Commercial Americanus",
a comic operetta set in a mythical kingdom.
9. Sonny and Cher perform
a medley of "Ain't No Mountain High Enough" and "Suspicious Minds"
10. Sonny and Cher close the
show with "I Got You Babe"
SHOW
2
Guest: Ken Berry
1.
As Sonny sings "Nobody Knows the Trouble I've Seen" at the piano,
Ken comes up to him, claiming to know all about his troubled past.
2. Sonny and Cher open the
show with "Joy To the World" and banter about Sonny's Italian
background.
3. Cher sings "Greensleeves"
in a comedy blackout as Sonny and Ken each take one of her hands
and walk off-camera.
4. Ken is featured in a musical
production number of "All I Need Is the Girl."
5. Ken gets vocally carried
away as he and Cher watch the film Love Story.
6. Sonny mimes a recording
of Jim Nabors singing "Gonna Build a Mountain" as two mountain
climbers struggle to get up to him.
7. Cher sings "It Had To Be
You"
8. Ken is featured in a repetitive
vaudeville routine about tap dancers whose top hats are taken
by the previous performers.
9. Cher attempts to show Sonny
what it is that he does best.
10. Sonny and Cher perform
a medley of "I Believe In Music" and "Put Your Hand In the Hand."
11. Sonny, dressed as German
composer Ludwig van Beethoven, interrupts Cher as she's trying
to have an intimate moment with the audience.
12. Cher sings "Mountain Greenery",
followed by "Big Yellow Taxi" (animated by John Wilson).
13. Sonny, still dressed as
Beethoven, has his big chance in the spotlight, singing "Mammy"
14. "The Cultural Spot" --
Ken is cast as the owner of The New York Times, hoping to get
a sensational story by printing tips from Sonny and Cher, in a
comic opera takeoff on the Pentagon papers inbroglio (set to Gilbert
and Sullivan's H.M.S. Pinafore).
15. Sonny and Cher close the
show with "I Got You Babe"
SHOW
3
Guests: Glen Campbell and Gideon and Power
1.
Sonny and Cher open the show with "With a Little Help From My
Friends" and an opening dialogue.
2. Cher sings "God Bless the
Child"
3. The rock group Gideon and
Power perform "In the Upper Room"
4. Glen sings "Today Is Mine"
5. Glen is the musical commentator
as Sonny and Cher do blackouts dealing with the future human condition.
6. Glen joins Sonny and Cher
for a medley of "Cry Like a Baby" and "Bad Moon Rising"
SHOW
4
Guest: Merv Griffin
1.
Sonny and Cher open the show with "Games People Play" and banter
about Sonny's logic that their show will become a mid-season replacement.
2. Merv sings "Get Together"
as the competition at an unusual ping-pong game in the background
gets out of hand.
3. Cher sings "Stormy Weather"
4. Sonny appears on-stage
with Cher dressed as Superman, claiming that nothing can deter
him from fighting crime in America except kryptonite.
5. Sonny proposes to bring
a semi-classical spot into the show by singing "Be My Love"
6. Sonny is surprised to learn
that their next guests will be the carpenters, not the brother-sister
duo but a group of construction workers, who erect a frame structure
around him.
7. Merv sings "What Are You
Doing the Rest Of Your Life?"
8. Sonny is taken by a gypsy
fortune teller (Cher).
9. Merv sets himself up to
be cut down by Cher in the same style she does with Sonny.
10. Cher and the Jimmy Dale
Orchestra capture the band sound in an elaborate production number,
singing "Strike Up the Band", "Alexander's Ragtime Band", "Sergeant
Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band", "Play a Little Samba" and "Funky
Nassau."
11. "Sonny and Cher At Home"
-- The Bonos parody the glamorous Hollywood lifestyle.
12. Sonny and Cher perform
a medley of "Stagger Lee" and "Rip It Up"
13. Sonny and Cher close the
show with "I Got You Babe"
SHOW
5
Guests: Phyllis Diller and Fanny, Cameo appearance by Merv Griffin
1.
Sonny and Cher open the show with "Proud Mary" and banter about
Sonny's horoscope having him think that he can't do anything wrong.
2. "The Cultural Spot" --
Cher is featured as "the princess who couldn't smile", with Phyllis
playing a court jester who tries to get her to laugh and Sonny
as a peasant with a song.
3. Cher, who is singing "We'll
Meet Again" while waiting for a romantic movie star to come and
sweep her off her feet, jumps from a bridge when Sonny shows up
instead.
4. The all-girl rock group
Fanny performs "Charity Ball"
5. Phyllis and Cher talk about
their husbands.
6. Sonny comes on-stage singing
"Puppet Man", until Cher pulls his strings.
7. "Cliff House" -- The master of the house (Sonny) brings his
new wife (Cher) home to the eerie mansion, much to the dismay
of his housekeeper (Phyllis).
8. Sonny and Cher perform
a medley of "Two Of Us" and "We Can Work It Out"
9. Sonny seeks advice from
a gypsy fortune teller (Cher).
10. Cher sings "Georgia On
My Mind"
11. Phyllis presents a comedy
monologue about life at home with husband Fang.
12. Sonny approaches Phyllis
with the idea of teaming up with him professionally.
13. Sonny and Cher close the
show with "I Got You Babe"
SHOW
6
Guests: The Grass Roots
1.
Sonny and Cher perform "Something" and "Maybe I'm Amazed"
2. "The Vamps" -- Cher is
featured in comedy blackouts as Helen of Troy, Catherine the Great
and Sadie Thompson.
3. Sonny and Cher appear in
a soap opera spoof called "Cliff House", a Gothic melodrama complete
with crashing thunder and eerie organ music.
SEASON
ONE:
SHOW
7
Guests: Harvey Korman and Robert Merrill, Cameo appearances by
Glenn Ford and Carroll O'Connor
1.
Sonny and Cher open the show with "All I Ever Need Is You" and
banter about their summer show and Christmas holiday together.
2. As Sonny recites his new
poem, "What Is Life?", the choir members behind him fall asleep.
3. Cher sings "Gypsies, Tramps
and Thieves"
4. Sonny, dressed as Henry
VIII, is given a citation for overacting by Glenn.
5. "The Vamps" -- Cher appears
as Nefertiti, one of the best-known Egyptian queens, with Harvey
cast as King Tut and Sonny as the official taster for the king;
the German songstress Lili Marlene (Cher) faces execution by a
firing squad, until she gets kissed by a German sergeant (Harvey)
who ends up riddled with bullets instead; and Sadie Thompson (Cher)
agrees to help a preacher (Sonny) save a drunken bum (Harvey)
from the demon rum.
6. Sonny and Cher perform
a medley of "Love Grows" and "Where You Lead"
7. Sonny turns to Harvey for
tips on how to handle Cher's put-downs.
8. Cher sings "One Tin Soldier",
an anti-war song illustrated by cartoonist John Wilson.
9. "All In the Familius" --
Robert is featured as Archie Bunker in an operatic satire of the
popular sitcom, with Cher as his wife Edith, Sonny as his son-in-law
Mike, regular Teri Garr as his daughter Gloria, and Harvey playing
both priest and rabbi, getting a double dose of Bunker bigotry.
(Carroll appears as the CBS censor, sent by the network to clean
up the show.)
10. Sonny and Cher close the
show.
SHOW
8
Guests: Tony Curtis and Dinah Shore, Cameo appearances by Glen
Campbell, Carol Burnett and George Burns
1.
Sonny and Cher open the show with "Sooner Or Later" and banter
about what makes their marriage such a solid success.
2. Sonny sings "Whispering"
until he's distracted by everyone whispering behind his back.
3. Cher sings "Come Rain Or
Come Shine"
4. Sonny plans a special memorial
surprise honoring Tony on the 20th anniversary of his film The
Prince Who Was a Thief.
5. Dinah tells Cher how her
marriage to Sonny is an inspiration to other couples.
6. Dinah sings "The Song Is
Love"
7. "Detective Fat" -- Everyone
is overweight in this spoof of the "Cannon" series, starring Tony
in the title role, Sonny and Cher as the couple who find a dead
man in their living room, and Dinah as the maid.
8. "Sonny and Cher At Home"
-- The Bonos parody the glamorous Hollywood lifestyle.
9. Tony shares fashion tips
with Sonny about the benefits of wearing a "sit-down suit."
10. Sonny and Cher perform
"Mr. Tambourine Man" and (with Dinah) "Joy To the World"
11. "Headlines In the Papers"
-- Tony and Dinah join the show's regulars in a montage of skits
and one-liners taking aim at current events in the news, such
as Democrats running for President, a nuclear explosion in Alaska
and The Godfather epic.
12. Sonny and Cher, with daughter
Chastity, close the show with "I Got You Babe"
SHOW
9
Guest: Carroll O'Connor, Cameo appearances by Jean Stapleton and
Jimmy Durante
1.
Sonny and Cher open the show with "Good Day Sunshine" and banter
about how Sonny sets Cher up for the big laughs.
2. "Information Please" --
The Presidential assistant to Marketing, Research and Economic
Stability (Carroll) attempts to explain President Nixon's wage
and price freeze.
3. Cher sings "What a Difference
a Day Makes"
4. Sonny, dressed in a costume
of feathers, announces that he's been studying birds and plans
to be the first man to fly.
5. "The Vamps" -- Napoleon
(Carroll) returns home to an unfaithful Josephine (Cher) after
his war with the Russians, and Delilah (Cher) learns that the
secret of Samson's (Carroll's) strength lies in his hair.
6. Cher sings "Mountain Greenery"
and "Big Yellow Taxi", while showing an animated satire on pollution
by cartoonist John Wilson.
7. Carroll proves to a skeptical
Sonny that his singing voice can shatter wood.
8. Carroll sings his own lyrics
to "Remembering You", the closing theme song heard at the end
of each "All In the Family" show.
9. Sonny and Cher perform
a medley of "Stagger Lee" and "Rip It Up"
10. "The Cultural Spot" --
In an opera based on TV commercials, Princess Celery (Cher) reveals
that she wishes to wed Oscar of Vienna (Sonny) even though he
is just a mere commoner and not of noble blood.
11. Sonny and Cher, joined
by Carroll, close the show with "Remembering You"
SHOW
10
Guest: Kate Smith
1.
Sonny and Cher open the show with "It Takes Two" and banter about
Sonny's new interest in body language.
2. "I Got You Babe" -- Sonny
is featured in a recurring skit as a struggling writer named Eddie
Farber, whose wife (Holly) adds to his frustrations with her shocking
confession that she's had an affair.
3. Kate sings "If He Walked
Into My Life Today"
4. A gypsy fortune teller
(Cher) predicts that a rich eccentric Texan will give Sonny one
million tax-free dollars.
5. Sonny appears as a motorist
whose car has run out of gas in an ecology satire.
6. Cher sings "How Long Has
This Been Going On?"
7. Sonny, dressed as Thor,
the god of lightning and thunder, attempts to bring a big bolt
out of the sky with his hammer.
8. A gypsy fortune teller
(Cher) predicts that Kate will have lunch with a tall, dark and
handsome stranger with a mustache.
9. An overly enthusiastic
waitress (Kate) serving two lovebirds (Sonny and Cher) in a tea
room has every line Sonny sings about in "Tea For Two" brought
to their table.
10. Sonny and Cher perform
a medley of "Walk a Mile In My Shoes" and "Games People Play"
11. "Headlines In the Papers"
-- Kate joins the show's regulars in a montage of one-liners and
comedy blackouts based on current topics in the news, such as
President Nixon's recent trip to Red China, women in combat, and
recruiting men for today's army.
12. Sonny and Cher close the
show with "I Got You Babe"
SHOW
11
Guests: Lorne Greene and Chad Everett
1.
Sonny and Cher open the show with "Put a Little Love In Your Heart"
and an opening dialogue.
2. "The Vamps" -- Cher appears
in comedy sketches as Scarlett O'Hara of Gone With the Wind, Greta
Garbo and Queen Alexandra.
3. Chad sings "Ain't No Sunshine
When She's Gone"
4. Lorne recites Shakespeare
to Sonny's version of the gunfight at the OK Corral.
5. Cher sings "I Got It Bad
and That Ain't Good"
6. Chad tries to get a nude
shot of his model (Cher) despite Sonny's objections.
7. Sonny and Cher perform
a medley of "Ain't No Mountain High Enough" and "Suspicious Minds"
SHOW
12
Guests: Tony Randall and Honey Cone
1.
Sonny and Cher open the show with "More Today Than Yesterday"
and banter about Sonny's new organic health food diet.
2. Cher sings "The Way Of
Love"
3. Tony leads the cast in
a sing-along of "Heart Of My Heart" at the piano bar of a 747.
4. "The Vamps" -- Lady Chatterley
(Cher) turns to her gardener (Tony) for affection after Lord Chatterley
(Sonny) seems to have neglected her; Sadie Thompson and the preacher
(Sonny and Cher) anticipate the arrival of a man sent from headquarters
(Tony), who is coming to review the preacher's progress on the
island; and Maid Marion (Cher) confesses to Robin Hood (Sonny)
that she's been seeing Little John (Tony) behind his back.
5. The female rock group Honey
Cone performs "One Monkey Don't Stop No Show"
6. A gypsy fortune teller
(Cher) predicts great opportunity in Tony's future.
7. Cher sings "Brand New Key"
to John Wilson's animated satire of the hit song.
8. Sonny and Cher perform
a medley of "We'll Sing In the Sunshine" and "You Are My Sunshine"
9. "The Cultural Spot" --
In an operatic spoof of The Student Prince, Tony appears as Frederich
Von Rotten, a dashing German soldier who's returned from the front
to marry the girl he left behind (Cher), only to find that she
had already married the town's common miller (Sonny) the year
before and has given birth to his child.
10. Sonny and Cher close the
show.
SHOW
13
Guests: Mike Connors and Jean Stapleton
1. Sonny and Cher open the
show with "People Got To Be Free" and banter about the art of
self-control.
2. Sonny and Cher are joined
on-stage by Mike and Jean, who only seem to have compliments for
each other.
3. Jean shows Cher a secondhand
pair of magic dancing shoes that she's just bought.
4. Cher sings "Body and Soul"
5. A gypsy fortune teller
(Cher) predicts good news and bad news for Mike.
6. "Meet the Candidate" --
A televised at-home interview with a Presidential candidate (Mike)
is interrupted by the unexpected arrival of his tipsy wife (Jean)
and a "surprise" visit from his close friend and black neighbor
(regular Freeman King), whom Jean reveals on the air is actually
the couple's butler.
7. Mike and Jean are featured
in "The First Annual Daytime TV Academy Awards", a takeoff on
awards shows, spoofing everything from daytime soap operas like
General Hospital to instructional cooking shows like The Galloping
Gourmet. The coveted awards are presented in such silly categories
as "The Most Cooperative Contestant On The Dating Game" and "The
Guest Giving the Most Consistent Answers On a Daytime Talk Show."
8. Sonny and Cher perform
a medley of "United We Stand" and "One, Two, Three"
9. "The Sonny and Cher Story"
-- The Bonos poke fun at their rise to fame -- from young singers
on the road, to Las Vegas headliners on the nightclub circuit,
to big TV celebrities with their own hit variety show. (Jean appears
as Cher's hardworking mother, and Mike plays the duo's out-of-work
manager.)
10. Sonny and Cher close the
show.
SHOW 14
Guest: Burt Reynolds
1.
Sonny and Cher open the show with "Cry Like a Baby" and banter
about Sonny's start in the music business.
2. Sonny gets Burt to re-create
one of the breathtaking stunts he's so famous for.
3. Cher sings "Am I Blue?"
4. Burt appears with Sonny
and regular Ted Zeigler as Americans during the Revolutionary
War in a comedy blackout about "Yankee Doodle Dandy."
5. Raggedy Cher breaks the
news to Raggedy Sonny that she's knitting them a baby.
6. Sonny encourages Cher to
help Burt get over his nervousness about meeting her.
7. Sonny's recitation of a
soliloquy from Hamlet causes Shakespeare to turn over in his grave.
8. "The Vamps" -- The serpent
(Burt) tries to tempt Eve (Cher) to get Adam (Sonny) to take a
bite of the forbidden apple in the Garden Of Eden; Wild Bill Hickok
(Burt) rides into town to challenge pioneer crusader Calamity
Jane (Cher) when he hears that she's been claiming to be his equal;
and, in a comic spoof of A Streetcar Named Desire, Blanche Dubois
(Cher) forces her affections on Stanley (Burt).
9. Sonny and Cher perform
a medley of "Bad Moon Rising" and "The Letter"
10. "Headlines In the Papers"
-- Burt joins the show's regulars in a montage of skits and quips
based on current items in the news, such as how hospitals are
getting overcrowded, air pollution, purse snatching in the park,
and Hollywood tidbits.
11. Sonny and Cher close the
show with "I Got You Babe"
SHOW 15
Guest: Art Carney
1.
Sonny and Cher open the show with "Can't Take My Eyes Off Of You"
and banter about Sonny's new interest in exercising and staying
in shape.
2. Art joins Sonny and Cher
on stage, complimenting Cher and searching for small talk with
Sonny.
3. Sonny attempts to perform
one of the old songs on the piano, despite Cher's warning that
Art doesn't like his voice.
4. Cher sings "Ain't Misbehavin'"
5. Sonny invites Art to play
an impromptu piece on the piano before the show's audience, and
then can't get him to stop.
6. "Army Life" -- Cher heads
a chorus line of dancers introducing an elaborate salute to life
in the US Army. In comedy blackouts, a World War II Field commander
(Art) has difficulty persuading his infantrymen to follow him
to the battlefront; Patti Andrews (Cher) is willing to do whatever
it takes to please the GI's while working at the U.S.O. During
World War II, and a sergeant (Art) brings a tough new recruit
into the undisciplined barracks of today's army.
7. "I Got You Babe" -- Holly
(Cher) tells Eddie (Sonny) that she'd like to have a baby.
8. Sonny and Cher perform
a medley of "You've Got a Friend" and "Here Comes That Rainy Day
Feeling Again"
9. "The Cultural Spot" --
Art joins the show's regulars in "Political Follies Of '72", a
classic vaudeville show spoofing today's political candidates
in the style of the old burlesque houses.
10. Sonny and Cher close the
show.
SHOW
16
Guests: Ken Berry and Ralph Edwards
1.
Sonny and Cher open the show with "Eight Days a Week" and an opening
dialogue.
2. Ralph Edwards surprises
Sonny with his This Is Your Life presentation.
3. Cher sings "As Time Goes
By"
4. "The Vamps" -- Cher appears
in comedy blackouts as Salome, Marie Antoinette and Sadie Thompson.
5. Sonny and Cher perform
"Dancing In the Streets"
6. Ken joins Sonny and Cher
in a Viking opera, country-western style.
SHOW 17
Guest: Sandy Duncan, Cameo appearance by Burt Reynolds
1.
Sonny and Cher open the show with "Got To Get You Into My Life"
and banter with Sonny comparing himself to a finely tuned Italian
race car.
2. Sandy joins Sonny and Cher
on stage, asking for Cher's permission to name her kitten after
her.
3. Cher and Sandy are approached
by a Hollywood prince (Burt) in the park.
4. Cher sings "The Man That
Got Away"
5. Sandy sings and dances
through an elaborate commercial spot for McTavish Aspirin.
6. "I Got You Babe" -- A struggling
young couple (Sonny and Cher) offers to keep Sandy's pet sheep
dog while she's out of town modeling in a ski show.
7. Sonny and Cher perform
a medley of "I'm Gonna Make You Love Me" and "My World Is Empty
Without You"
8. "The Cultural Spot" --
In The Gypsy Doodle, an opera set to music from the Roaring Twenties,
two sisters (Sandy and Cher) compete for the gypsy king's hand
in marriage, despite the frantic warnings from an old gypsy crone
(regular Ted Zeigler) that an evil curse will come upon everyone
in the camp if the king should choose the wrong girl for his bride.
9. Sonny and Cher, with daughter
Chastity, close the show.
SHOW 18
Guests: George Burns and David Clayton Thomas
1.
Sonny and Cher open the show with a medley of "The Beat Goes On"
and "It Don't Come Easy" and banter about Cher being named one
of the ten best dressed women in America.
2. Sonny shares the stage
with George, who delivers his own style of standup comedy.
3. Cher sings "You Made Me
Love You"
4. "The Vamps" -- King Ferdinand
of Spain (George) sends Christopher Columbus (Sonny) off to discover
the New World after he catches him making love with Queen Isabella
(Cher); and while attempting to help his best friend (George)
win the affections of the lovely Roxanne (Cher), Cyrano de Bergerac
(Sonny) ends up getting the girl himself.
5. Singer David Clayton Thomas
(former with the group Blood, Sweat and Tears) makes his television
debut as a soloist with "Magnificent Sanctuary Band."
6. George appears as a bartender
offering advice on life and love to Sonny and Cher.
7. Sonny and Cher perform
a medley of "Two Of Us" and "We Can Work It Out"
8. "The Cultural Spot" --
Sonny and Cher are joined by the show's regulars in Trial By Error,
an operatic spoof of Clifford Irving's biography of Howard Hughes,
set to Gilbert and Sullivan music.
9. Sonny and Cher close the
show.
SHOW
19
Guest: Merv Griffin
1. Sonny and Cher open the
show with "Get Ready" and an opening dialogue.
2. Cher sings "The Way Of
Love"
3. "The Vamps" -- Merv joins
Cher in vamp blackouts of Bonnie and Clyde, Theda Bara and Sadie
Thompson.
4. Sonny sings "For Once In
My Life" to backdrop photos of Chastity.
5. Sonny and Cher sing "A
Cowboy's Work Is Never Done"
6. Merv appears as Vlada the
Horror in a Russian opera with a Xavier Cugat beat.
7. Sonny and Cher, along with
the Tony Mordente dancers, perform "The Sonny and Cher Stomp."
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